Recently I had the fun of engaging with a group of women in a Q&A session. And they asked some great questions! I’ll share one of them in this post and at least one other in a future post.
“How can I get my husband to see that Scripture has more than negative rules—do’s and don’ts? Growing up we tend to hear the ‘rules’ and not the love.”
A really important question. But it made me a little sad—to think how easily our view of scripture can be distorted (depending on our backgrounds and early exposure). For the Bible truly is God’s love letter to us. Or, as Philip Yancey so succinctly put it, “In a nutshell, the Bible from Genesis 3 to Revelation 22 tells the story of a God reckless with desire to get his family back.” (The Jesus I Never Knew, p. 268) The “rules” are rooted in relationship. They grow out of our relationship with God. And they facilitate better relationship with others. God’s ways are, as some have put it, user friendly.
So how to help someone see the true message of the Bible? My first thought was, “Invite him to read it!” But then another part of this woman’s written question got me. “How can I get my husband to…?” The short answer? You can’t “get your husband to” do anything.
Bulletin: We wives are not called to be the Holy Spirit in our husbands’ lives—no matter how good we might think we could be at the job! So maybe our starting point should actually be on our knees. Step one would probably be: “Pray that the Holy Spirit will open his eyes and heart to God’s message of love to him.”
Then think about how your husband might best be able to see the scripture for what it is. Maybe there’s an opportunity to attend a class or join a small group that could help him hear God’s message of love to him. Or, if he’s a reader, books like Tim Keller’s The Prodigal God or Philip Yancey’s What’s So Amazing about Grace? might be useful.
Perhaps best of all, try showing him the love of God in the way you love him. After all, our children often best come to understand how God loves them by the way we love them. May be that could help a husband, too.